Sunday, December 6, 2009

Currently listenin to "Tears" by X Japan. It's one of my favourite too. I hope you won't get sick of it Zanzan. Sorry if you do. Really, I am. My sis is now likin "Tears", "Forever Love" and "Longing... togireta melody". Everytime both of us listens to "Longing", Hide's image will appear in our minds and eventhough she is new to X Japan, havin someone important missin in anyone's life like Hide for X Japan, it hurts her. Even till now. She really likes it when I sing though I don't know why. I did ask before and her only reply is that there's a certain feel that I manage to deliver out when I sing though I find that rather... weird of her. Serious.


Wednesday will be the day I'm goin for another checkup. Haish... troublesome... I'm kind of scared of what will the result be after the checkup. It's either it will be a slightly bad state or it didn't grow at all yet. Either way, it's still bad because it's due to this headpain that my fever refuses to leave. Talk bout that, my cough is gettin rather irritatin now. Just now, my whole relatives came over for a while and the first thing that my grandmother ask me was, "Have you healed? How about going to the doctor?"


My mum helped me answer but sayin no to everythin which is true. They are extremely worried bout my chest pain that came about last week but I'm fine now but they keep emphasisin the fact that it may be ok now but if it does return, it's not goin to be pretty and may be a little too late for easy treatment. Hehe... If they are alreadie this worried over somethin that I am not even sure of, imagine how worried they would be if they were to know about this thing that is growin inside my head? That is why I chose not to tell everyone. I know it's not to keep secrets like this especially the ones that endanger one's life but I can't bear to take away their smile...


Speakin of that, *psst psst* Zanzan. Do you notice a young lady that visits you from time to time? Hehe. I feel like I wanna talk to her. In a way like being friends with but er... I like don't know how to. A little scared too~ Hehe! Hey hey now Zanzan! Don't smack me! Please!


She seems like a nice person to me. But at the same time, she seems like a lonely person too. I feel like I want keep her company. Bringin out her smile too but I think she would mind that. Ah gomen gomen! I'm kinda that sort of person. I can't see anyone whom I know being sad or down. It make feel like I have to do somethin to make him or her smile again. ACK?! I just hope I'm not being irritatin to anyone... Gomen Gomen!! Really sorry uh lady!


Hehe.. I guess that's it for today. I really hope to get to know her more but... hehe... I rather not disturb her or else she might get angry or somethin. BYEBYE Zanzan~!

posted at 11:50 PM